“About” pages are a rather strange entity in online spheres, since they aren’t really telling you everything about the person they are meant to represent. They are stale from the moment of inception, they mostly reflect a single facet of the person that varies dependant on the audience it has been geared for, and in most cases they are, at best, a complete pack of lies.
This one certainly differs little from that baseline. I can feel the mould creeping across the page as I type it, when I finish the composition it will unlikely reveal the sides about me you are actually interested in, but at least one thing I can say in its favour is that conservation surrounding the truth will be the extent of the normal distortion of reality normally ascribed to these musings.